While most gaming sites have spent some time meticulously pouring over game elements in order to come up with some ridiculous quantitative value to represent the fun they had (or didn't), I propose something a little different. I feel that quantitative reviews are, frankly, garbage. I don't think that for films, however, but video games especially deserve a better system than numbers to rate their quality. Having the conversation with a bunch of critics on how to correctly and quantitatively review a video game would be absolutely ridiculous. I do recognize the simplicity of a 5-star review system, even a simple 1-10. But when reviewers (whomever could I be talking about) give 5 separate 1-10 scores and come up with some ludicrous mid-range real number (e.g. 6.8) and claim that this real number is "Not an Average," a little part of me wants do explode through the internet wires and uppercut them to the moon. If you are going to score a game in 5 different areas with 5 different scores and then give an overall score, how can that overall score not be an average? Get what I'm saying? It's like you are grading the game on 5 areas that don't matter. Then you're ignoring your scores and rating the game somewhere on the Fun-O-Meter... Super Mario Bros. gets a 9.875 on the Fun-O-Meter (not an average).
How the %#*@ do you get a 9.875 from anything other than an average!?!?
I digress. Basically, although it may seem like it, that little rant is not necessarily meant to be directed simply at reviewers. I'd also like it to stand as a point, reviewers are simply human. They play a game and then they give it a score. I'm sure someone somewhere told them that it needed to be an asinine real number in order to be a good review. "Real numbers make you look like a computer. Don't you want to look like a computer?" But can they really do anything beyond guess? No. They think about the game and then throw a number at it. It is not a science.
Therefore, I propose that we simply do not give quantitative reviews to a video game. Films are one thing, 2 hours and you're done. You can sum up the quality of a film with simple numbers. Is it perfect? No. Does it serve as a fantastic benchmark for the better understanding a film? No. But critics and viewers don't invest the same amount of time and fundage in a film as they do in a video game. It is my opinion that video games should be simply given either a recommendation or a desperate plea to move on.
"You absolutely must try this game" is a lot more direct than a "7.9." So good, it could have been an 8.0.
So what the hell does this have to do with Assassin's Creed? It serves as a reaction to the overabundance of reviews and comments that have been swelling up all across the net. While it may seem a bit defensive (it is), that is not it's purpose. I merely wanted to point out that there is a reason why I won't be giving Assassin's Creed a numerical value... because that's complete bullshit.
Onto the matter at hand. Like so many others I finally got a chance to sit down and spend some serious time with Assassin's Creed yesterday, and before I say anything else I want you all to know that the game is an undeniable good time.
It's not without its hangups, but the overall experience is very rewarding. Being able to scale any building and stand atop it as you plan your next move is simply exhilarating. The key word there is 'plan.' In order to get the most out of Assassin's Creed you simply cannot rush through it. Spend some time in the kingdom and explore. Pick fights for no damn reason at all. Punch the crap out of some crazies (no, the guards won't stop you until you draw a weapon). Do these things, and you'll have an amazing time.
That's really where the game fails (if you can call it a failure). AC relies on its players to become completely immersed in the game world. (Semi-Spoiler Begins)The side-plot offers up some fantastic metaphorical likeness to the world of the protagonist and our own. Without ruining anything for those who haven't spent any time with the title, Ubisoft wanted players to be immersed in the game so completely that they forced the hero's immersion onto them as well. You have to stay in sync with the game in order to fully enjoy it. (Ends) And while this may seem like quite a task, Ubisoft(in my opinion) has done everything they can to keep that level of immersion at it's highest. Including the option to change the camera angle in a dialog whenever you see a glitch, which I think is a huge leap forward. While it may expose the game's engine weaknesses, it allows players an opportunity to move on and stay within the bounds of the game world.
As for the minor hangups...
The combat system has its head scratching moments. You'll wonder why you don't use a counter against everyone.
The horse physics are great, but you don't get your own horse for keepsies. No Epona to love and cherish this time around. Take anyone's horse, they don't even care.
The loading screens make you listen to the same damned tips over and over.
Finally, the smarts of the AI isn't quite at the level of perfection Ubisoft had indicated. It seems a huge task to get AI perfect, and while AC does well most of the time, the game will make you laugh out loud over some bonehead guards.
Almost everywhere else, the game truly does everything right. The game is not tedious unless you make it so. Sure, you could only do one type of intel work over and over in order to open up the opportunity to get your kill, but why would you spend 60 bucks on a game just to blaze through it? I implore other assassins out there to actually collect every bit of intel they can on a target before swooping in for the kill. I'm sure you'll find the final blow much more rewarding after you here all about the SOB's wicked ways.
 After an unnecessarily long rant and a simply short review, I leave you with a recommendation. You should really give Assassin's Creed a try. If you've just purchased Super Mario Galaxy, or plan to devote yourself to Mass Effect save Assassin's Creed for when you are finished. As my roommate pointed out, AC doesn't seem like a game you can put on the shelf for a while and come back to later. Give it the full attention it deserves. | 
